Field report: Croatian frame-battle date

Approaches: 90 out of 700

Lays: 2

Just came back from a date with a Croatian girl. How I met her was quite unusual, but in short she was introduced to me through her friend that I number-closed at a sex toy stand in a drug store (right in the center of Zagreb). Yeah, bizarre. Everything leading up to the date was kind of strange too. Even though she had never met me, she responded really well to the texting and we set up the date after only 3 message exchanges. Afterwards we continued to text and I included some standard attraction material, for example comparing her to a raccoon and telling her that she had the same kind of big, crazy eyes.


She always responded quickly to my messages and seemed to be totally in my frame, for example by initiating the conversation from her side and by re-confirming the date. My only explanation for her behaviour at that time was that she couldn’t be as hot as on her Whatsapp profile picture, and that’s why she was so eager to meet a guy that she didn’t even know very well. Anyway, I just thought the date would be smooth sailing.

I meet her in front of the drug store at 8pm and she is actually a cute girl. Big brown eyes, long hair and about the same height as me. We walk to a nice cafe I found the other day and I try to have a normal chit-chat conversation with her, but it just doesn’t flow. She told me beforehand that she can’t speak English that well, but which was not really the issue, she just doesn’t contribute to the conversation. We sit down in the corner of the cafe, and because I notice that the music coming from the speaker behind me is quite loud, I tell that we will move to the table next to us. That’s when the frame control battle begins. She says”No, I find it comfortable here. We will stay at this table” to which I reply something like “No come on, don’t be lazy. We will move over here”. After some back-and-forth she finally relents and we sit at the table that I want. This kind of thing continues all the way throughout V1 up until we enter V2. She either doesn’t say anthing and IOD’s me by looking away or at her phone (to which I respond in kind by IOD’ing her) resulting in awkward silences or she disagrees with most of the things I say and tries to snatch the frame. It was a test in staying unreactive. I occasionally challenge what she says and agree&amplify her shit-tests. After some time the conversation reaches some flow and we get to know eachother a bit better.

After around 20 minutes I tell her that we will go to the next bar, which she somehow finds totally strange and confusing, saying that she wanted to stay in the cafe for 2-3 hours (telling me that that’s what Croatians do) and then go home. Again, I just consider everything she says a shit-test and eventually lead her out of the cafe to a bar near my apartment. I let her order some wine mixed with cola that she wanted to drink and she finally opens up a bit more. We talk about family, relationships and what her ideal life would be like. I move next to her to show her some pictures of my travelling. I try a little bit of kino by telling her that I play piano and that I want to compare my hand size to hers, but she just recoils at any little kino attempt. That’s when I realize that I need to change my strategy to a more risky one if I want to get anywhere with her.

I tell her that my Russian ex-girlfriend has the same name as her (which is true) and looks similar to her, so I show her some pictures of us in Vietnam. While I show her the photos, I can literally see the pre-selection attraction switch being flipped inside her. She says “Wow, she’s beautiful. Why did you break up with her?”, which I use to segue into the broader topic of relationships, sex and why girls have often dirtier thoughts than men, to which she agrees. I ask her “What’s the craziest sexual thing you have ever done in your life?” and she tells me something about going into the woods with a guy, but not having sex with him there. When she asks me the same question, I tell her the true story of how the Russian girl visited me at my faculty once and how I fucked her in a disabled toilet while all the other students were stuck in a math lecture. I make sure to use the NLP-ish words of “strong”,”slow”,”in-and-out”,”hard”,”fast”,”hot” while describing how it happened and to include as much emotion and detail as possible. I look deep into her eyes while telling the story and I can see how her eyes go wide and how it turns her on. I give her the speech about how I don’t believe in good or bad girls and that every girl should live out her sexual fantasies, and how society is putting unnecessary pressure on girls to behave “good”. I tell her another similar true story about how I fingered the same girl in an alley in Venice during the night with the lights of the ferries shining in occasionally. After the story, she admits that the craziest thing she has done was going into the forest with a guy without having sex is because she actually has never had sex before. I just act slightly dismissive, telling her that I don’t get why she didn’t have sex yet although she’s already 20, to which she starts to qualify by saying that she just didn’t find the right guy yet and how she can’t believe that I’m not approving like other guys. I IOD her a bit and give her a slightly weirded-out look, and I can sense that the script is finally flipping into my direction.

We continue to talk about sexual stuff and I steer the conversation onto the topic of “50 shades of grey”, and she tells me that she has both read the book and seen the movie. I realize that I can make the interaction even more sexual by showing her the text conversation I had with the Thai boxer, telling her that that was my attempt at writing this kind of erotica. She reads the messages, her eyes getting wider and wider, occasionally looking at me with a look of unbelief. She finishes reading and tells me that she feels hot now and how she could imagine all those things (she was also a bit red). I move closer to her, look deep into her eyes and tell her “Do you know what I would like to do right now?”, to which she answers “I have a pretty good idea”. I then take her face and make-out with her for a short time (until she breaks the kissing, which I should have done first of course).

I tell her that we will go to my apartment to try some German beer, and she resists a bit, saying that she can’t stay long and that’s not what she normally does. I just hold my frame, get her to pay for the wine (I paid in the cafe) and lead her to my apartment, which is just 3 minutes away. During our walk there, I tell her that she has to promise me to behave and not do anything weird or crazy inside my apartment, and that I have to get up early the next day and that’s why she can’t stay long. I accuse her of having dirty thoughts and trying to seduce me.

When we are inside my apartment, I put on some indie-rock, pour both of us a bottle of Radler, have a small sip and then use the bathroom, to give her some space to relax. Afterwards, I tell her to sit next to me on the sofa, so I can show her some more pictures of my travels in Thailand. We look at the pictures, and she tells me that she only has 10 minutes left with a kind of restless look on her face. So I put the iPad away, grab her face and make-out with her. She’s fully into it. I grab her shoulders and push her underneath me on the sofa, and do all the usual escalation stuff like biting her shoulders and ears and grinding my knee between her thighs. After about 2-3 minutes of this, I just stop the escalation and sit-up because I know that there’s not enough time to lay her that night. I tell her something like “it’s too fast, we should slow done. what are you doing with me?”. The push works beautifully and now she actually jumps me, sits on top of me while grinding her pussy against my crotch. Girls really are creatures of their emotions, in the 2nd venue she wouldn’t even let me touch her hands, and now she was on my sofa dry-humping me while I was spanking her butt. After a while of this, she gets up and tells me that she really has to go catch the last tram before it’s too late. So we get out of the apartment, walk to the tram station and say goodbye.

It was definitely an unusual date for me, and it’s funny how I still managed to somehow stumble through the date model up until the final step.

Learning points:

  • the question “What’s the craziest sexual thing you have ever done in your life?” combined with the toilet sex story is a good way to segue into the seduction phase when everything else fails
  • the push after the first escalation was really good and I should have done the same for the 2nd time, to make her want more. I tried to make her come the 2nd time, which was not the best idea

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